Game of Thrones – Season 7, Episode 6: ‘Beyond the Wall’ Review

In light of the place-setting and conversation-heavy tone of last week’s episode, ‘Eastwatch,’ I was giddy that Game of Thrones was going to give us an explosive, nail-biting, and emotionally devastating installment with ‘Beyond the Wall.’ After all, Game of Thrones has a made a habit of exciting and/or traumatizing its fans in its penultimate episode, as this one is in the shortened season. And while we certainly got a fantastic amount of tension, especially as it concerned our mash-up kick-ass band of Game of Thrones warrior fan faves, it wasn’t without its weaknesses – weaknesses that I sincerely hope they remedy by the end of next week’s finale. And don’t even get me started on the Sansa and Arya storyline. With that, let’s get on with the review.

Littlefinger Pokes at Sisterly Bonds

As you’ll recall in the last episode, Littlefinger apparently knew that Arya would be snooping on him and decided to plant the note Sansa wrote to Robb in Season One to get him to surrender to save their father’s life under his bed. Now an already-skeptical Arya just has more ammunition against a sister who she hardly knows anymore, and now believes that she willingly threw her family under the bus instead of writing the note out of coercion fear while living as a hostage with the Lannisters.

I’ve been an Arya fan since the beginning, and have become even more of a rabid fan the more assassin-like and murderous she becomes. I know that’s sick and twisted, but I also know most of you are right there with me! So, it’s maddening to not only see Arya fall for Littlefinger’s deception, but also to give Sansa such a hard time when we all know what a punching bag Sansa was for several seasons. Was Sansa spoiled? Yes. Materialistic? Yes. Shallow? Definitely. But in the repeated tragedies she’s suffered, Sansa’s actually become a savvy leader, even though her philosophy is often at odds with the ever-honorable Jon Snow. And she’s totally right to shut Arya down and remind her that Jon would had unequivocally lost the Battle of the Bastards had she not called in reinforcements from the Knights of the Vale. And had Sansa gone into vivid detail about how Sansa had been beaten and disrobed in front of court courtesy of Joffrey, or nearly killed by her Aunt Lysa, or raped repeatedly and beaten by Ramsey, perhaps Arya would be a little more sympathetic to the unbearable journey Sansa had taken to get to this point. But Arya the Assassin has no room for sympathy, and instead berates Sansa for writing a note under duress when she was a terrified 13 or 14 year old.

But even though I was siding with Sansa for most of this, she wasn’t without her boneheaded moves, either. Why send your only true protection – Brienne – out of Winterfell on your behalf to King’s Landing? It could have been anyone! She could have literally sent anyone from any of the other houses, and they would have gone. Even fucking Lady Mormont would have gone on her behalf, and oh my god, how awesome would that have been?! But nope, Sansa sends the most trustworthy person in Winterfell who has sworn to protect her far away to King’s Landing where Brienne has no chance of saving her should Arya decide that Sansa belongs on her list. I’m less concerned with Brienne protecting her against Littlefinger – whose weapon is his mind rather than a sword – than I am with her protecting Sansa against Arya, at this point.

And another thing! Why in the hell is Sansa confiding in literally the most shady, conniving person in Winterfell with her Arya issues? Is there nobody else that could have lent an ear? I vote again for Lady Mormont to fulfill this role, because Sansa definitely needs a good talking to, and Lady Mormont can always be counted on to lay some truth down.

Now about Arya. Way to make one of my favorite Game of Thrones characters absolutely unbearable for an entire episode. Arya’s complete lack of empathy towards Sansa was incredibly hard to watch, and rather unnerving. Arya should be way smarter than this; she should at least be questioning why Littlefinger would be in the possession of the note in the first place. She should at least confront Sansa about having Littlefinger keep the note a secret on her behalf (which Littlefinger implied when he thanked some men for bringing him the note), even though that’s absolutely not the case. But Game of Thrones just fell into the same narrative laziness that made Lost so frustrating during its third season; the characters are not asking the obvious questions of one another because the writers need to stretch out this tension and this arc for just a little bit longer. So we have to endure not one but two scenes where Arya and Sansa argue with and threaten one another instead of simply sitting down and getting to the facts.  Had Arya just answered the fucking question about where she found the note, this all would have been resolved in no time. Because then Sansa would have said she only wrote one note, they would have realized that somehow the note never got to Robb, and then they would have asked why Littlefinger would be in possession of this note, and why he decided to keep it for like six seasons (or years, WHATEVER). Problem solved, time to kill Littlefinger, THE END.

I have faith that the writers will resolve this issue sooner rather than later, but I also don’t think that Littlefinger will die when the two sisters realize his deception. He’s been playing the long game for way too long for them to kill him  off without us first  finding out what his grand plan is. Like they did with Margaery…. Aw, shit, never mind.

Tyrion is Becoming a Broken Hand

As if poor Tyrion didn’t receive enough of a verbal lashing from Dany two episodes ago about losing both Dorne and Highgarden, the scene he shared with Dany this episode wasn’t much better. It starts out pleasant enough; she tells him that she thinks he’s brave and that she likes him because he’s not a “hero.” But then when the conversation turns to her temper and her succession should she die, Dany becomes kind of intolerable again. While Dany has definitely not completely turned to the dark side, she has certainly shown some shades of Cersei of late, which makes me worry for Tyrion’s fate. I don’t think she’ll do away with him entirely, but she  appears to be losing her patience with him quite often, and this coming from a woman that doesn’t have that many good ideas on her own without people telling her what to do. Pretty convenient place to be when things don’t work out your way! And Dany seems totally oblivious to the fact that she’s becoming just another spoke on the wheel she claims she wants to break. And hearing this from Tyrion isn’t doing him any favors since Dany’s ego has become quite fragile this season.

I’m curious to see how this relationship evolves ahead of when the fateful meeting with Cersei happens, and Tyrion sees his brother Jaime standing beside her when the wight is revealed, and terms of a temporary peace are discussed.

The Mag Seven of the Seven Kingdoms Go Huntin’

Let’s be honest. This was never the brightest idea. Seven – albeit badass – men head north of The Wall to capture one wight to bring back to Cersei to convince her that the Army of the Dead isn’t just a wive’s tale. Okay fine, let’s see what happens. We will certainly have an exciting episode this way, at the very least. I have to say that while I was downright giddy to see the team-up of Jon, Jorah, The Hound, Thoros of Myr, Beric, Gendry, and Tormund head straight into danger, especially when some hilarious and moving male bonding was involved along the way,  I was almost certain a major character was going to die given the circumstances. My bet was on Tormund, and while I came very close to being right, it would have literally destroyed me. The only other feasible characters that could have died without sending us into narrative chaos were Beric and Thoros of Myr, and ultimately, it was the latter that fell, despite having just been saved from being mauled by a zombie bear. You read that right. I was sad to see Thoros go, but we can’t deny that he was one of the more expendable characters out of our misfit crew. Pour a 40 on the icy curb for Thoros, yo.

And let’s not pretend at this point that Jon Snow isn’t pretty much invincible. While every scene north of The Wall was wrought with anxiety and tension and downright incredibly visual effects, it’s dampened by the fact that we know they’re not gonna kill of Jon Snow, no matter how dire the situation becomes. Similarly, they weren’t going to kill off Gendry or Jorah because they literally just came back. Beric still seems to have some kind of destiny to fulfill alongside the similarly immortal Jon, so he’s off the list. And it now appears that the writers didn’t have the heart to emotionally destroy a country full of Tormund/Brienne ‘shippers by killing him, either. So, yes, it’s always going to be awesome to watch these men kick some ass, but it becomes slightly less interesting when it doesn’t look like anyone is in any real danger.

Having said that, I will admit to being pretty devastated with the fall of Viserion via White Walker javelin. We had to realize a dragon vulnerability at some point, though, since Qyburn’s Scorpion apparently only gave Drogon a measly little flesh wound that he recovered from pretty quickly. Now that we know that The White Walkers have sniper-like aim with their deadly javelins, we have something to worry about, and Dany doesn’t seem so invincible anymore. Quite the contrary, she may be motivated to keep her babies from danger unless absolutely necessary.

Either way, the action that took place North of the Wall, especially with Zombie bear, the attack of Dany’s three dragons, and the birth of White Walker dragon, was visually spectacular. And I’d be totally lying if I said I didn’t squeal in terror at several moments.

Prediction: Dany and Jon Hit It By the End of Next Episode

Okay, so to say that there’s an attraction between these two at this point is stating the obvious. But I think there’s always been the question of when these two were going to tap it and whether it was going to happen before or after they found out they were related. I think for the sake of not completely grossing us – and them – out, it’s going to happen before they realize their lineage, and it’s going to happen in the next episode.

Just think about it. Jon is about to go off to meet Cersei to present her with the wight, and they’ve got to suspect that she might have some kind of mass murdery plot up her sleeve. So, before he goes off, I bet you 3 White Walker spears that it happens before he goes off! And not to be gross, but I literally can’t wait. This hook-up MUST HAPPEN.

There’s totally a joke right in front of me about Dany bending her knees now that Jon has bended the knee…I’m not going to tell it, but it’s sitting right there. In all seriousness, I suppose it’s pretty difficult at this point to argue the superiority of a woman that flies her three dragons to save your dumb ass from being killed (again). And I bet you he thought it was kinda hot. Pun intended.

We’ll have to tune in to next episode – titled ‘The Dragon and the Wolf’ – to find out if I’m right. Make sure to set your DVR’s to record to the 1hour 20minute mark because this finale is going to be super-sized. Until then!