Game of Thrones – Season 7, Episode 2: ‘Stormborn’ Review

image: HBO

SPOILERS BELOW

While most of ‘Stormborn’ proved to be yet another place-setting episode with a lot of chess pieces slowly moving further into position, it certainly ended with a bang. Literally. It appears that Uncle Euron is apparently incredibly skilled at appearing out of absolutely nowhere to not only obliterate Yara and Theon’s fleet of Pyke’s “best ships,” but also depriving us of an HBO-worthy Ellaria Sand/Yara Greyjoy hook-up. He is officially the villain of the season. There were other cheer-worthy moments including Jon handing over the keys to Winterfell to Sansa so he can go meet Dany, Sam telling Jorah he will not let him die, and the return of Nymeria. Kind of. And with that, there’s a lot to get to, including some scenes I’m not sure I needed. On with the review!

Daenerys Has Way Too Many People Advising Her

Dany is making me very nervous. There, I said it. I haven’t always been a fan of her decision-making process, and this episode gave me a couple of instances where there was cause to be concerned. The first of which is in her questioning of Vary’s loyalty. Girlfriend should know by now that in order to move forward in your pursuit of the Iron Throne, you have to make some uneasy alliances. And while it’s completely understandable to question the motives of anyone with Vary’s track record, she probably shouldn’t have been so keen to almost be rid of him, especially in light of the fact that she unceremoniously exiled a certain Mormont who turned out to be totally loyal to her, and whom she asked to come back. She only decided to keep Varys around because she was talked into it, and while it’s encouraging that she’s willing to take the advice of people like Tyrion, she’s also malleable enough to be persuaded by people like Olenna. Olenna is wise, but her particular advice (“BE the dragon”) would have been better served in another moment when the Iron Throne wasn’t on the line.

Secondly, can we just discuss the incredibly convenient High Valyrian translation of “the prince OR PRINCESS that will bring the dawn”? By the way, Melisandre is back at Dragonstone. Look. I’m all for gender equality in Westeros, of women fighting alongside men, of women ruling in mens’ stead when they go meet Dragon Queens, etc. However, this seems like something dropped out of nowhere to service a certain outcome of the story, and I wasn’t completely into it. Like NOBODY else could have translated this for us until the SEVENTH season of the show? COME, NOW.

For what it’s worth, I think that the interpretation will eventually be “the prince AND princess who will bring the dawn.”

Okay, I’m done.

Thirdly, under counsel from Tyrion, Dany decides to send a raven to Jon to have him come and meet her as an ally, and apparently as a subject, as well. Dany is wearing her Queen airs a bit boldly at the moment, as shown by her demand that Jon “bend the knee” when he comes to see her. Perhaps we’re supposed to question it, or to be put off by it? Both were the case for me. We all know Jon Snow has information too valuable to Daenerys that would make him a simple subject, so the request seems slightly unreasonable, but we’ll see what comes of their meeting that is DEFINITELY HAPPENING NEXT EPISODE.

Tyrion Reveals His Master Plan

I know we’re only two episodes in, but I feel as if we’re not seeing nearly enough Tyrion. Nonetheless, he had a great scene in which he reveals his strategy for taking King’s Landing. Westerosi will lay the siege, and the Unsullied with Dothroaki will take Casterly Rock. As always, Tyrion, well played. Tyrion proves again that he is the brains of the operation, and Dany is able to get buy-in (sorry, Corporate America speak creeping in)  with her fancy job title from Ellaria Sand and Olenna Tyrell.

Unfortunately, Olenna is poking the hornets nest hiding in Dany’s ornate braided-do by suggesting that she’s paying maybe a bit too much attention to Tyrion. Good advice? Maybe. Bad timing. Absolutely.

Jaime Continues to Be the Most Whipped Man in the Seven Kingdoms

Cersei gathers the lords of the three measly kingdoms she still has some authority over to try to convince them to fight for her against the impending attack from Super Evil Daenerys Targaryen. She does her Cersei-est to try to paint Dany as some ruthless conquerer who crucifies people who don’t deserve it (they kind of deserved it). One of the Lords she has to appease is Lord Tarly (Sam’s father) who showed up only because he knows what she does to her enemies (see: Sept of Baelor). And who’s at her side to give the hard sell? None other than Jaime Lannister, First of His Name, The Hopelessly Whipped.

He tries to convince Lord Tarly to turn on Olenna, even though he’s sworn an oath to House Tyrell and he’s known Olenna since he was a child. Randyll is a pragmatic man; he knows that he has to at least entertain the option, but he is also honorable enough to question it. In the end, it looks like he’s going to follow through, but the more interesting point here is that Jaime appears to be putting in a legitimate effort to help Cersei win. We already know he doesn’t see the point in it since they have no children to pass anything down to (thanks to Cersei), so why give Lord Tyrell the hard sell? I supposed he could legitimately fear for his own safety since Cersei is batshit crazy, and he really doesn’t have anywhere else to go. But I hate that Jaime’s character has only become a stalwart Cersei loyalist, even though she had a very heavy hand in their son’s death. Jaime is a character that I’ve come to love because of the deep conflict he feels between his love (gag) for Cersei and his better angels that allow him to be loyal to people like Brienne. Randyll Tarly is absolutely going to go along with this, but I’m wondering how much further Jaime will go to further Cersei’s cause. I feel like the Jaime we’ve come to know would feel more ill-at-ease with his current position, but we’ll have to wait to see if this remains the case in upcoming episodes.

Missandei and Grey Worm Have a Beautiful Scene (I’m Not Sure I Needed)

Look. I really like both Missandei and Grey Worm. I think that they are both very likable characters in a show literally overstuffed with characters I care way more about. It’s not their fault at all; Nathalie Emmanuel and Jacob Anderson do  commendable work playing these peripheral characters, but there simply hasn’t been enough room throughout the series to truly develop their characters in any kind of meaningful way. I find the moments they share moving, and I think the “sex” scene in this episode was really tender and affecting, but….

WE ONLY HAVE SEVEN EPISODES THIS SEASON. Should we have gotten rid of the scene altogether? No. Maybe. Wait, no. But it could have been shorter because we have to get Dany to King’s Landing already.

Sam Plays Doctor with Jorah

“You’re not dying today, Ser Jorah.” ~ Sam Tarly

Jorah’s in bad shape, folks. But it’s a good thing he found himself at the Citadel where bookworm Sam Tarly was studying to be a Maester, and upon hearing Jorah was the son of Jeor Mormont, was determined to find a cure for his severely advanced greyscale.

Though Archmaester Ebrose tells him that he’s a lost cause, Sam continues to subvery authority at the Citadel by sneaking into Jorah’s room to perform a disgusting surgical procedure of sorts that will cure him of his disease.

Side note: is Game of Thrones on some sort of mission to ensure I NEVER eat dinner again while watching the show?

This is going to totally cure him. Moving on!

Arya Feels the Call of Family Tugging At Her Drunken Assassin Heartstrings

Arya winds up at the establishment where Hot Pie continues to wow patrons with his nuanced bread-making abilities. He asks her if Brienne found her, and seeing her cold, non-chalant, unaffected sociopathic demeanor asks, “What happened to you, Ayra?” Then she asks for the ale and downs it like a sailor, or like someone who was just asked about their tragic past. Hot Pie then tells Arya and tells her that the Boltons are dead and that Jon is the King in the North. Here, we see Arya’s humanity break through those wide eyes; for a moment, she sees true hope to see her family again. She doesn’t look like she’s about to calmly murder someone (or a very large group of people); she looks like someone who urgently needs to be with her family.

And with that, her itinerary changed from “Check in to King’s Landing, Murder Cersei” to “Ride to Winterfell, Hug Family, Check in to King’s Landing, Murder Cersei.”

And on her way, she gets reunited with an old friend. Maybe. Maybe not, but close enough to get me to tear up. When Arya is surrounded by wolves as she attempts to warm herself by a fire in the forest, and is then approached by a grey-coated direwolf, were you there with me screaming “NYMERIA!!!!!”  for all of the tenants in your apartment complex to hear? Here’s another glimpse of Arya as a pleading child, not a calculating murderer. Here’s a direwolf we haven’t seen since the second episode of the first season. This was the direwolf she saved as Mycah, the butcher’s boy, was tormented by Joffrey. Whether or not this was actually Nymeria is beside the point. This was simply evidence that Arya is literally soaked in loneliness, and desperately in need of people (or animals) that she can trust. The Stark children have been apart so long that I’ve given up being hopeful about whether a full reunion will ever happen, but I felt an immense sadness in this scene for Arya, and the fact that she still doesn’t have true companions she can trust. And no, Hot Pie doesn’t count because delicious bread will only get you so far.

Jon Continues to Out-Ned Stark Ned Stark, But Let’s Sansa Drive the Family Truckster

One of my favorite conflicts that continues to manifest this season is between the divergent philosophies of Sansa and Jon. Sansa has been so hardened by the world that she doesn’t even trust the words of Tyrion, who she even admits was nothing but kind to her when they were married. When Dany requests that Jon come to her, Sansa and Ser Davos are justifiably cautious, even though dragons would be a super handy weapon against the wights. At first, Sansa’s counsel to not go seems totally reasonable, but when Sam’s message from the Citadel alerts then that Dragonstone is literally loaded with dragon glass, Jon sees no choice but to eschew everyone’s advice (including the abnormally sage Lady Mormont) to go and meet The Dragon Queen.

Sansa protests hard that he not go, until he says he’s leaving Winterfell in her hands while he’s gone. And if a tear didn’t come to your eye during this scene, you LITERALLY HAVE NO SOUL. In the last episode, Jon sarcastically asked if he should trust Sansa’s advice, and now he is entrusting her to rule in his stead. With Littlefinger not too far away, I have no idea how well this will turn out, but I have a feeling Sansa has plans for him, whether Jon is there or not.

Euron Proves That He Can Totally Ruin a Perfectly Good Plan

So…

First, let me just say that I have some serious logistical problems with Uncle Euronary Tract Infection getting these stunning, formidable ships out to sea as quickly as he did. So there’s that. Secondly, how in the hell did nobody in Yara and Theon’s fleet NOT see these ENORMOUS SHIPS sailing toward them that looked exactly like the ships your uncle would have made if he were to have new ships made after you stole the best ones? I mean, seriously.

Okay, I have that off my chest.

Let’s just say that Euron had the time to build the ships. Fine. That NOBODY saw them coming. Okay, fine, whatever. But that he had the foresight to know where they were and exactly when to strike? Now, I’m willing to give Game of Thrones A LOT of leash when it comes to playing with the timing of when events happen on the show, but this is stretching my suspension of disbelief a bit too far.

However, since this is my favorite show on television, I’m going to focus on the positive.

This was a masterfully-staged scene. The darkness, fire, and chaos at sea was brilliantly staged, photographed, and edited, and gave me a true sense of HOLY SHIT WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIE. Or at least Ellaria’s daughters will, which they did. The last we saw Ellaria, she was being taken away by Euron’s lackey’s to be brutalized in ways only HBO can imagine, but I think we’ll be seeing her again.

The kicker came when we saw Yara being held hostage by Euron, with Euron egging Theon on to come and save her. Theon’s PTSD kicks into SUPER high gear, and he jumps ship, abandoning her.

Now, it would be easy to categorize Theon’s actions as strictly an act of cowardice. It very well may have been. But I have a feeling that there was at least a hint of strategy here; that he thought that if he did go after Yara, there was a good chance that both of them would die. At least, if he jumped, he would save himself and be able to get back to Dany to warn her of what had happened. I’m willing to give Theon the benefit of the doubt here given his devotion to his sister since he returned to the Pyke.

But yeah, I have a feeling that Theon will not survive the series and will have to sacrifice himself in some heroic way for MAJORLY punking out on his sister. Even if you have your reasons for doing what you did, the Game of Thrones universe has a habit of making you pay for bad decisions. Unless you’re Cersei, apparently.

Other Thoughts

• We did not see Yara die. Is she the gift to Cersei? I could have sworn it would have been Tyrion, and don’t quite see delivering Yara as having a huge impact, but we’ll see.
• Whenever Qyburn is working on something new, we should be worried (see: The Mountain). Now, he has a Dragon Killer weapon that can pierce through their skulls. At least one dragon is going to die from this. Maybe two.
• We basically know that Jorah will be cured of the Greyscale, so what’s next? Will he go to Dragonstone and return to Dany, and if so, in what capacity can he serve her?
• One of the theories in is that Jon Snow and Dany will eventually serve as King and Queen of the Seven Kingdoms. But Jon Snow has made it known he doesn’t even want to be King. So, is there another candidate?
• Littlefinger basically declared his love for Sansa, for which Jon promised to kill him if he laid a hand on her….Littlefinger is totally laying a hand on her, isn’t he? Only thing is, Sansa is probably hiding a dagger under her pillow after years of abuse and will probably chop said hand off.

Join me next week for a review of Season 7, Episode 3: The Queen’s Justice.